It is said that the Boys think differently of marriage than the Girls.
A vision of the hearth and home, kids frolicking around, a manicured
lawn, the white wooden fence with a wicket gate, a swing in the porch,
the pillow talk, the holidays and hill stations, a secure future with a
comfortable bank balance and so on and so forth is what most of the
girls envision when they think of the word – MARRIAGE. The male’s
perspective is different. But wait.
Let’s double check to see if it is really true and how is it so?
Desire to dominate
The male’s idea of masculinity arises from the content derived from books, history, quotable quotes and the braves of folk lore, muscle touting peers, films and heroes in advertisements. These influences prod a male to be a knight in shining armour galloping on a white steed, gallantly rescuing the princess from the demon as a mark of personal strength.
The male’s perspective with regard to the role of women stems from this outlook. The typical belief that the female is weak and fragile further dries up the respect required to bestow the status of equality upon women. This convoluted perception leads the males to believe that the female must remain a willingly-obedient partner in the post marital scenario.
All men may not have this archaic mentality of looking at women as chattels. There are many intellectually sound men who have broken free from this medieval mentality. But such men are few and far between. Most men see women in a subservient role in the arena of marital bliss.
The desire to lord over the fairer sex is a universal male disposition.
The male filter
A majority of men do not look at women as individuals. The female partner is just an ‘object’ needed to cohabit. The want is carnal, earthly and physical. If the thought looks far-fetched let all males tarry and honestly introspect on how many of them did deliberately search for a visibly ugly though highly merited girl for marital relationship? The result will be embarrassing.
The male’s prism filters only the physical traits to go into a relation. How can marriage remain a lasting institution and marital vows a holy writ with this temperament in males?
Unfortunately for males the marital Vows lay stress on monogamy
“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person”, said McLaughlin. Here lies the rub. Men are hardly monogamous. It is not to suggest that men are basically lechers. But most are borderline cases.
The belief in one man – one – woman and the institution of marriage is not intrinsic to the male bent of mind. Most men look at marriage as a convenience in existence. It is a contract. Most will not think twice in breaching it at the first opportunity of a one night stand if they can safely escape the consequences. The thought may seem highly derogatory towards males but so is the fact.
Exceptions are always relevant. The institution of marriage could be sacrosanct for many men due to tradition, religious belief and even conscious acceptance. But the breed is dying.
Let’s double check to see if it is really true and how is it so?
Desire to dominate
The male’s idea of masculinity arises from the content derived from books, history, quotable quotes and the braves of folk lore, muscle touting peers, films and heroes in advertisements. These influences prod a male to be a knight in shining armour galloping on a white steed, gallantly rescuing the princess from the demon as a mark of personal strength.
The male’s perspective with regard to the role of women stems from this outlook. The typical belief that the female is weak and fragile further dries up the respect required to bestow the status of equality upon women. This convoluted perception leads the males to believe that the female must remain a willingly-obedient partner in the post marital scenario.
All men may not have this archaic mentality of looking at women as chattels. There are many intellectually sound men who have broken free from this medieval mentality. But such men are few and far between. Most men see women in a subservient role in the arena of marital bliss.
The desire to lord over the fairer sex is a universal male disposition.
The male filter
A majority of men do not look at women as individuals. The female partner is just an ‘object’ needed to cohabit. The want is carnal, earthly and physical. If the thought looks far-fetched let all males tarry and honestly introspect on how many of them did deliberately search for a visibly ugly though highly merited girl for marital relationship? The result will be embarrassing.
The male’s prism filters only the physical traits to go into a relation. How can marriage remain a lasting institution and marital vows a holy writ with this temperament in males?
Unfortunately for males the marital Vows lay stress on monogamy
“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person”, said McLaughlin. Here lies the rub. Men are hardly monogamous. It is not to suggest that men are basically lechers. But most are borderline cases.
The belief in one man – one – woman and the institution of marriage is not intrinsic to the male bent of mind. Most men look at marriage as a convenience in existence. It is a contract. Most will not think twice in breaching it at the first opportunity of a one night stand if they can safely escape the consequences. The thought may seem highly derogatory towards males but so is the fact.
Exceptions are always relevant. The institution of marriage could be sacrosanct for many men due to tradition, religious belief and even conscious acceptance. But the breed is dying.
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